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We met in a chat room created for people affected by a rare
genetic disorder. She has the disorder; I manage the chat room
as the Communications Director for the Health Foundation
dedicated to supporting people affected by it.
I was attracted to her at once, for her wit, her insight, her
unmistakable love of life, her stubbornness, the fact that in
spite of her disability, she was the primary caregiver for her
ailing mother-- for her unbreakable spirit. I struggled with my
attraction, wondering if it was unprofessional, reminding myself
she's only type on a screen...
...but I kept going back. Even when a new host eliminated the
need to return. And our conversations lasted longer each week,
until suddenly, in a private message, she sent me a question
that changed our lives:
"Are you single?"
Soon, neither one of us could deny what we were feeling... and
we started to make plans to meet in person, to find out if what
we were feeling was "real." Her last relationship had ended in
betrayal, as had my marriage. Gun shy yet excited, flight plans
were made.
Her mother passed away, three days before the trip. I offered to
come to her; we decided she should focus on family, and
postponed the trip.
The day she was to get on a plane to come to me, an uninsured
driver ran a red light, shattering her pelvis and hip. I offered
to come to her; she decided, through pride at not wanting to
appear weak to me, that I should wait.
The third try was cancelled, as well, due to medical
complications and her intensive physical therapy schedule... and
she sent another message that threatened to change our lives:
"Maybe all this is God's way of telling us we shouldn't be
together?"
Hurt, confused, I opened my MountainWings email... stalling,
not knowing how I would respond to her question... and read
about the cake recipe.
With laughter in my throat and tears in my eyes I clicked
forward, typing a short note: "Maybe He's reminding BOTH of us
this won't be easy? But the end result will be worth it? Let's
bake a cake."
She responded with "I love you."
That afternoon, she was approached by her boss, asking her if
she'd like to fly to my city to interview for a position-- a
promotion-- here. The next day her therapist-- the best in the
country dealing with her condition-- told her they were through
the worst of it, and he'd consult with another therapist, if
she'd prefer not to travel to him once a week for three days.
And while I STILL hold an Expedia ticket with THREE change fees
tacked on to it, she arrives here on Wednesday, all expenses
paid.
We still have a long way to go. We still don't know how "real"
this is. But I'm confident, based on how our feelings have grown
over the past few months, and all we've learned about each other
through these trials, that we're making something beautiful.
Perhaps even a wedding cake.
Thank you.
~A MountainWings Original by Bill Bradner, Alexandria, VA~ |
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